Well today is the last day of the 30 things list. If you made it all the way through, congratulations! Our final question on THE LIST is: List 10 things you would hope to be remembered for.
Please keep in mind that these are not necessarily all qualities that I actually possess, but things that I'm working on and hope to one day master to the point that I could be remembered for. 


1. My unwavering faith. 
2. My great listening skills and ability to give sound advice. I'm not there yet, but I'm improving.
3. Being a really good mom. I want to be the kind of mom who my kids can talk to about anything. We have an understanding that nothing is off limits, and they trust that I will answer them as honestly as I can. ( Even the "where do babies come from" question. I used to say I wasn't sure because I had never had one, but I'm even honest - though not thorough- about that one:) I want to be their friend who they like to spend time with and know that they can trust, but more importantly I am their mom, and I want them to always know that I will do what's best, not what's popular. I'm working to find the right balance there, but I hope to one day get there.
4.My parties. I am a party thrower. There is nothing more fun to me than a really good party. I especially love a party with a theme. I love the planning stage, the decorating, the food, the people. I just love parties. And some day when I get my life all back together again, I am going to become known for my fabulous parties.
6. My compassion. (Stacy calls me an enabler, but I'd like to think there is a difference:)
7.Successfully reforming child welfare. (a girl can dream, can't she?:) Kid's are our future, but sadly they are not treated like our most valuable resource. They should be. Laws as well as priorities need to change. I am pretty passionate about this, and could go on and on about my ideas on change, but I won't, I'm sure you'll hear all about them in a few years when I take this country by storm. :)
8. My best you've ever tasted, died and gone to heaven, no one can eat just one, change your life chocolate chip cookies. (this dream came from when we lived in Enoch and Troy was a young men's leader and the boys would randomly drop by our house to chat about life and I would make them cookies while we visited. They all raved about my cookie recipe and it became a goal of mine to continue to improve it until it became the best. I really think that the best conversations happen sitting around the kitchen table, eating hot from the oven cookies. It really could solve all the world problems. Maybe the president should rethink the bowls of apples he brags about having throughout the White House, chocolate chip cookies could possibly fix some things for him...:)
9. My passion for the things I care deeply about.
10. My ability to find humor in every situation. (I know it isn't always appreciated, but someday I'll find someone who does appreciate it, and I'll keep him forever, and that's what he'll remember fondly about me.:)


And some things that I will probably be remembered for, but don't necessarily WANT to be- my ability to embarrass my daughter, my ability to put my foot in my mouth, my tendency to pick a fight just because I love me a good argument, the fact that I very easily get emotionally attached to people who have problems, my obsession with cleaning supplies and brand new toothbrushes, the way I wear flip-flops all winter long, and the way I obnoxiously take pictures of EVERYTHING. 










*And this has nothing to do with this post, but Happy Birthday to my very favorite sister in the whole world! 

She happens to by my best girl's favorite person too.

Misunderstanding #29

#29 on the list is: What do you think people misundertand most about you?


Normally I would say that people generally mistake my shyness for my being stuck up. I'm not stuck up at all, but I am shy, so I don't talk much before I know a person. It's been that way all my life, and I've often had people tell me later that they thought I was stuck up or snooty. 
But lately I'd have to say that people misjudge my opinion on divorce. It seems like anyone who is having problems in their marriage or anyone who's wedding date is approaching, and they start to have second thoughts think that I will have all the answers to what they should do. You would not believe the phone calls and e-mails I have received lately, I'm not even kidding. Now first of all, I would have to say that I am more than happy to listen to your problems. I can ask probing questions and help you re-examine your point of view. I can even lead you to find some solutions, or give ideas that might help you decide what to do, but I WILL NOT EVER TELL YOU THAT YOU SHOULD GET A DIVORCE! I won't do it. One, because it isn't my place, but mostly because I rarely think divorce is a good idea until you have tried EVERYTHING ELSE. Everyone is shocked when they hear me say that. I guess because I did get a divorce people assume that I am pro divorce. But that isn't exactly true. Yes I did get a divorce, and yes it was a quick decision, and an uncommonly quick outcome. (I had my divorce decree in my hand 11 days after I filed- it usually takes at least 90) And yes, getting a divorce was the 100% right thing for me to do - no questions asked, my kids, myself, as well as Troy are all much happier and healthier because of it. But, it wasn't something I did lightly. I did a lot of soul searching and praying and weighing the options. Both of us did. It was absolutely the right thing for us and I have not regretted it for one second since, but if working things out would have been the right thing to do I absolutely would have done it. I believe in marriage. I think that a marriage where both people are working at it can be a beautiful thing. And I believe in forgiveness. So I believe that a marriage, even at it's breaking point can be saved if it's the right thing to do. So if you are looking for someone to take your side or tell you how great divorce is and how crappy marriage is, or dog on men and say how "they're all the same, you can't trust any of them", you are coming to the wrong person. I love men, I love love, I love marriage, Finding a good man who will love me and my kids and marry me for eternity is my biggest goal. I am hopeless romantic at heart, and while most people seem to think I would be a bitter man hater because of my situation, it just isn't true. 


Also, a lot of people think that I like animals and I don't, they think I hate living here and can't wait to move, and that isn't true, and 37 of my "friends" have sent me that link to the blog about the gay LDS man who is happily married to a woman, so I assume they misunderstand my opinion about that as well. :) 


BTW, happy birthday to me today, I'm the big 30! So far, it feels a lot like yesterday...

The best time of the year.

I'm at the Fuller Family Reunion! It's my favorite thing, especially now that I have kids. I was really lucky to have a lot of cousins around my age on that side of the family, and now a lot of them have kids who are around the same age as my kids. I love that they will have built in friends. I love how excited they are to see their cousins and how they have been planning all the great things they are going to do together. I love how excited I am to see everybody and visit, and catch up. It's going to be so much fun! So the reason I am telling you this is because I love all the emails I'm getting from you all lately, and I really appreciate all of your questions and comments. It has been so much fun getting to know all my readers better. But until Monday I won't be writing back. I love you, and appreciate you, but this weekend I'm cutting loose with my family. Talk to you soon. And yes, that super flattering picture up top is of me kicking butt at the hula hoop contest at a reunion luau a few years ago. See what a rockin' good time it is? Don't you wish you were with me? I'll fill you in when I get back.:)

The language of LOVE... #28

28 on THE LIST is What is your love language?

I've taken these quizzes several times when I was in college the first time studying family relations, but it hasn't been for years, so I decided to google it and take one again to see if I have changed. I went to THIS SITE which has a pretty straight forward version of it, you are welcome to go take the test for yourself if you want, and let me know what you got.
I learned that even after all these years I haven't changed much. I have always had acts of service as my very first love language with words of affirmation physical touch and quality time in close second, and receiving gifts far behind. This time the only difference was that the first four only had one point separating them all. I think that's pretty accurate actually. I really do know that someone loves me when they do little things for me. Honestly if I had to choose between you doing the dished for me or showering me with jewelry I would pick the dishes every time. But these acts of service are sometimes given in the form of a nice note telling me you appreciate me, or a hug or a back rub, or a great conversation, and I think that's why the other options always come in so close behind. The way that this becomes important is when it comes to the relationships with those around me. Troy's love language was receiving gifts, so when he wanted to tell me that he loved me or wanted to appologise for something he would buy me a gift, because that's what he would want. But, that is the last thing I wanted, so to me it meant very little. And when I would try to  tell him I loved him I would bake him cookies, or mow the lawn, because to me, it's easy to go out and grab a gift off a shelf at the store and bring it home, but giving service takes sacrifice, so in a way I am giving you a little part of my heart. But to him, it was no big deal, he would rather have a gift. It took us a few years before we actually figured it out, but it really did help our relationship to understand that. The site with the quiz has a quiz for kids too, so I made my kids take it (it counted as their school work point for the day, so they did it without complaining:) and it is kind of interesting. Adia had a tie for quality time and physical touch as her strongest, and Ethan had words of encouragement and gifts at the top of his - with NO points for physical touch, which didn't surprise me, but did make me giggle a little - poor guy to have a hugger as a mom.:) None of those results surprised me at all, I kind of guessed before they took the quiz, but it did make me rethink the way I show them love. While I would normally think that surprising them by having cleaned their rooms for them when they get home from school, Adia would rather have some cuddle time on the couch discussing her day, and Ethan would rather have a little surprise waiting for him with a note that says "you're awesome!" Knowing this makes it easier for me to show the kids I love them. (And in time hopefully I can help them see that the way to show me they love me is by cleaning the toilet or emptying the dishwasher:)

Music #27

27 on THE LIST: What is your favorite part of your body and why?
Here's what we think of THAT question:

That's right, that question gets a big fat thumbs up accompanied by an extra spit-y raspberry!


So I decided to change the question. Instead of my favorite body part we are going to talk about my favorite songs. While I don't have any musical talent whatsoever, if you know me at all you know that music is SUPER important in my life. Music speaks to me in so many ways. When I have intense feelings and can't find the words I turn to my favorite songs to express the things I can't on my own. I like pretty much all kinds of music at least a little, so there are a lot of songs to choose from. So here are a few of the best loved, and what they do for me. To hear the songs click on the name of the song and it will take you to the link, but don't judge me based on the video, some of them are super cheesy and I can't help that:)

• My favorite sing at the top of my lungs in the car song: "I want you to want me" by Cheap Trick because it's just that kind of song. :)
• The song that reminds me of my sister is "Walkin' After Midnight" by Patsy Cline, or better yet, by Bobbi because she used to sing that as we walked out to the bus stop in the wee hours of the morning in the dark and even though I acted like I hated it, I really thought she had the best voice EVER, and it helped me not be afraid to walk in the dark.
• The song that reminds me of my mom is "Leaving On A Jet Plane" by John Denver. One time my mom had to make a long trip in a terrible blizzard. We were all really worried about her because the roads were so terrible, but my grandpa was having open heart surgery and she felt like she really needed to go anyway. So she drove us out to the bus stop, and while we waited, she sang us this song. By the time it was over, my sister and I were in TEARS. She still teases us about that. 
• The song that reminds me of my dad is "Everything I Own" by Bread. My dad still has a record player and all his old records from when he was young (or giant black CD as my kids call them) and when I was younger he would sometimes play them and dance with us in the living room with us while he sang along. I LOVED doing that, and this was one of my very favorite songs he had.
• The song I love on those days when someone really ticks me off is " I Pray For You" by Jaron and The Long Road to Love because even though I don't actually wish bodily harm to come to anyone it totally makes me giggle. Plus it's one of those songs you can belt while you're driving in the car, and you always feel much better when you're done.
• The song that describes my marriage is "If I Die Young" by The Band Perry because it did die too young, and it never really had a chance to become what it was always meant too. And the last part about the dove helped me figure out and feel good about that whole DOVE situation I had right after my divorce.
• The song that describes the way I feel a lot lately is "Sweet Silver Lining" by Kate Voegele
• The perfect, things-aren't-going-so-well-so-let's-dance-until-we-forget-about-it song is "Tonight, Tonight" by Hot Chelle Rae. It's also my kid's current favorite, and it cracks me up at the end when it says "even the white kids" and Ethan points to me every time, like I'm so much "whiter" than they are.:)
• The best driving fast song is "Katie Wants A Fast One" by Steve Wariner and Garth Brooks, because it's kinda true.
• The song that would absolutely not be on my playlist if I didn't have kids, but I am slightly embarrassed to admit that I don't really mind it being there is "Introducing Me" by the little Jonas from the Camp Rock 2 soundtrack.
• The best don't give up song is "Swim" by Jack's Mannequin. There are so many profound and amazing lines in that song that help you realize you have to keep going. 
• The song that reminds me of my best friend Levi and brings a smile to my face is "Abracadabra" by Sugar Ray, even though I have no desire whatsoever to actually "reach out and grab" him.:) But it's our favorite because we first heard it together when we were hanging out in my room and thought it was ridiculously inappropriate.  But the song that reminds me of him and the rest of my best friends in a sentimental way is "I'll Be" by Reba because we always have and always will be there for each other.
• The song that reminds me of high school is "Stick Shifts and Safety Belts" by Cake or "steal my sunshine" by LEN because it reminds me of skipping class and driving too fast on the mountain road.
• The song that I always think of at graduation time is "Another Brick in the Wall" by Pink Floyd. Not sure why.
• My all time favorite love song is "Hey There Delilah" by Plain White T's or "Fools Rush In" by Elvis Presley. Just because.
• The song that tells of our journey to becoming a family is "God Blessed the Broken Road" by Rascal Flatts because when we started our journey we were all broken and wounded but through a series of miracles we eventually made it to each other.
• "Broken" by Lifehouse is my favorite song that reminds me of  the power of repentance and forgiveness, and the Love that we can find in our Savior. (I know, but just listen to it, you'll get it)
• Mean by Taylor Swift reminds me of my ex husband. :)

• When I need a good cry Landslide by Fleetwood Mac gets me every time. I belt it out at the top of my lungs, and let tears just stream down my face.
• My favorite song to sing in the shower is either "Bridge Over Troubled Water" by Simon and Garfunkel or "The Rose" by pretty much anyone who ever sang. I just sound so good in there. :)

There are hundreds of other songs that have touched me in one way or another as well. The songs I really love have a specific, meaningful memory associated with them, and they continue to speak to me for years and years. So, what are your favorite songs? Do we have any in common? Do you have any suggestions for me? I'd love to hear about it!

You've got it all wrong. #26

#26 on THE LIST: What popular notion do you think the world has most wrong?


I think the world is selfish. Everywhere we look we are told to "look out for number one" and "if you want it, take it" and "do what feels good". It's all about fulfilling your desires at the exact moment you feel them, and worrying about the consequences later. There is no thought about how it effects other people; as long as it makes you happy, go for it. I don't like that. I think that most of the world's problems could be solved with just a little more kindness and putting others needs before your own every now and then. I'm not saying that you shouldn't go after your dreams, and I know that sometimes your success will mean another person's failure, but I think if we cared about people more than things and other's feelings more than our own sometimes, it would be a much better life for all of us.

A special dinner. #25

#25 on THE LIST: If you could have dinner with anyone in history, who would it be and what would you eat?

It might sound lame to some of you, but out of all of the people who have ever lived, the one I would like to spend an evening with, more than any other, would be my Great Grandma Harvey. There are so many things I would like to ask her about and didn't when she was alive. There are so many stories that I haven't yet heard. And I could use her advice right now. Plus, I just really miss her, and wish I could have one of her great hugs. And we would eat all of her special recipes. The pies, and the fry bread, and the candy and all of my favorite things. And we would eat it all and not worry about overeating because this is my dream and I can have it any way I want.:) 

Family #24

24 on THE LIST: Describe your family dynamic of your childhood vs. your family dynamic now.


I kinda feel like I've talked quite a bit about this already this month so instead I'm going to tell you a little about my grandparents. I was very lucky growing up. One set of Grandparents lived about two miles to the East of us and one set lived about a mile to the West, so we literally saw them several times a week. Every Sunday we would go visit each set of grandparents. At my Wilcox grandparents house the grown-ups would sit and visit in the living room, and my sister and I would go play dress up in Grandma Bobbie's closet. She had literally hundreds of shoes lined up in her closet, and all of them were beautiful! And she also had a purse to match each pair of shoes, and she had tons of big flashy jewelry. We spent hours in her closet dressing up in those things, and I remember always feeling like a movie star or something. My grandpa owned a cattle ranch and in the summers he would take the cows to a range called South Mountain, in Colorado. Sometimes we would go there and help with the cows or fix fences (at least that's what we said we were doing, really, we rode horses and played around, but we liked to call it work:) I have hundreds of memories of South Mountain, but even more fun than that was when we would stay home with Grandma instead. She always had the yummiest icecream in her freezer, and when we stayed with her and Grandpa was gone we would watch movies and eat icecream and popcorn until late at night. Then when it was time for bed my sister and I would pile into bed with Grandma and she would tell us stories about her growing up in the Ozarks until we would fall asleep. My Grandma was the Postmaster in our little town, and sometimes I would stay with her. I would help her sort mail, and look at the stamps and envelopes stacked neatly in the drawers. I loved to play with the rubber stamps that said things like FRAGILE or RETURN TO SENDER, it was so exciting to work with her. When Grandpa was home and he had time to take us with him I always had a wonderful time. We would drive around in his truck that smelled like Budwiser and cinnamon Certz. He really drove about 15 miles an hour everywhere we went, but he would always tell me we were going 100 miles an hour. I always pretended that I believed him and that I was scared, and he loved teasing me. In actuality I might have really been scared, he had usually been drinking, and he wasn't a very good driver. I know that sounds kind of unpleasant, but I really do remember the times I spent with him with fondness. 

My Grandma Bobbie and her husband Neldon, who I love just like a grandpa.

My Grandma and Grandpa Fuller at my Grandpa's 80th b-day this February. Excuse the picture quality, it was taken with a cell phone, and then stollen from Facebook:)

I probably spent more time with my Fuller grandparents than the Wilcox ones. My grandma used to babysit me a lot, and I had a wonderful time there. My Grandma worked as the custodian at the church, and I would tag along with her. I remember dusting the wood in the chapel and tending the flower beds with her. She taught me a song about little purple pansies that I still sing to my kids. And in the summer there were these birds called mud dobbers that would build ugly nests in the eves of the church. That was my favorite thing because we would put a high powered nozzle on the hose and shoot the muddy nests down. (remember how I don't like animals). I loved being at their house. My grandma is the best cook ever, and we would always have delicious meals at her house. Some days my grandpa would come home for lunch and I loved those days the best. When we were done eating we would go lay on his bed and he would give me black licorice that I would munch on while he took a nap. On the days Grandpa wouldn't come home Grandma would read me stories after lunch. Sometimes she would try to skip pages so that she could get finished faster, but I always caught her and made her do it right. I'm sure she LOVED that. :) My grandma is a wonderful artist, and the lucky grandkids who spent enough time at her house got to paint a picture with her. She actually did most of the artistic stuff on mine, but she let me paint the sunset and the trees, and I felt so artistic. I was actually lucky enough to get to paint TWO pictures with her (that must mean I was the favorite, right?:) and they are still some of my most prized possessions. My grandma has a green thumb too. She has magnificent flower beds and an orchard full of fruit trees and a grape arbor and a HUGE garden. She can make anything grow. When I had my own house it was surrounded with starts of plants from her, and every spring when the flowers would bloom I would think of home and of my Grandma. 


My grandpa Wilcox passed away when I was in high school, but the rest of them are still around, and I love that my kids have the opportunity to build relationships with them too. I was lucky enough to know my great grandparents when I was growing up, and those memories are still very precious to me. I am grateful that my kids have that same opportunity. 

Hobbies #23

23 on THE LIST: List your top 5 hobbies and why you love them. (Sadly when I was posting this I realized that I don't have a lot of pictures of my hobbies. In fact this silly t shirt is one of the only ones I have. I'll have to fix that one of these days.)

1.  T-shirts. I enjoy screen printing and stenciling t-shirts. I like that if I have something to say I can put it on a shirt. I like that if I want to give someone a special gift that comes right from the heart I can make them a shirt. I like that I make shirts that can make me giggle, or make a statement, or give someone comfort. And the possibilities are endless. Any idea that pops into my head, I can slap it on a shirt. Nothing boring about that. 
2. Decorating. I love to decorate my home, or anyone's for that matter. I love the painting, the picking out color schemes, the planning, and executing, and seeing the final product. I love it so much that when I owned my own home I was constantly decorating room after room. And just as I would finish the last room in the house it was time to start over with the first room again. 

Me as a freshman in college when I started to really learn to cook.

3. Cooking. I was kind of a tomboy when I was growing up, and while I can operate heavy equipment and weld, and hunt, I was never very good at "housewife stuff". This included cooking. But in a way that has been really fun. I enjoy learning new techniques and recipes. I love experimenting with different flavors. I love that I am developing a style all my own, not the one that was taught to me growing up. Yes, I do still make some old family favorites, but I like to come up with my own stuff too.

4. Jewelry making. I have been doing this since I was in high school. I like wearing unique pieces that no one else has, and I like thinking outside the box. When I was in high school I was kind of on an industrial kick which included chunky chains and funky hardware but I have evolved into a little more feminine style. I still like unique styles, and still most of my jewelry was made by me. 


5. Mod-podging things onto other things. I like to see the combinations of things that you wouldn't expect to go together, and I like to have things around my home that no one else has. Plus, it's just kinda fascinates me, I don't know why. 

The future #22

#22 on THE LIST: Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 10 years? 15 years?
In the last few years I have learned not to count on things. You might have plans, but so does God, and guess who wins in the grand scheme of things? I do believe in dreaming though. And I believe in making goals and working toward something, and even making plans, but not becoming set in stone about the way things are or are not going to be. Maybe that's the right way to think about things, and maybe it's not, but it's all my wounded heart can allow for, so I've chosen to change the question a bit. Instead I am going to list some things I wish for my future. These don't have a time line attached, and they aren't listed in order at all, they are just things I want to see happen at some point in my life. 
Finish School
Get a real job
Move somewhere that has a more abundant and slightly less creepy single population :)
Buy a house with a back yard so Adia can have a dog (yuck, I know, but that's how much I love her)
Make a difference for someone
Date a lot
Meet my true love
Get married
Have babies
Adopt more babies
Have a big family
Learn to take pictures for real
Go on an african safari
Hunt in Alaska
Snorkel in the Great Burrier Reef
Work in the temple
Smooch my grandbabies
Be somebody's Cool Aunt Katie
Visit Greece and Italy
Learn to surf
Learn to sign fluently
Learn to speak Spanish
Go Skydiving
Get a Master's degree

Chip it!

I have to let you in on my new very favorite thing to do. I'm not kidding. It's called Chip It! from Sherwin Williams. I love to decorate, but even more than that I love to come up with ideas of rooms I want to have one day. And painting is one of my favorite parts. I love choosing the perfect color for the walls, and how color totally transforms the room. But then I love how adding other colors for furniture and accessories can totally change the feel of the room. I like my rooms to have themes too, like autumn or english tapestry or great grandma's china, one thing or feeling or season that inspire the entire space. That's why I love Chip It! so much. Here's how it works. You install the Chip It! button on your toolbar (just like you do with pinterest) then you find a picture online that you love the colors of, it could be a dress or a handbag, or a place you would love to vacation, anything really. You click the Chip It button and Kabam! Magic happens and it shows you the perfect color scheme for a room based on the colors in the picture! It gives you the paint chip color names, so if you find the perfect color you could go to Sherwin Williams and buy the paint. Sadly I'm not living in a "paint the walls" situation, but I still use it as a starting point for the color palette for a rooms. I love it. I basically go around "chipping" everything I see. And it is the perfect combination with Pinterest. For example, my bedroom is built on a "red barn" theme. So I went to pinterest and typed in Red Barn. Then I chipped all the pictures until I found the ones that stood out to me. Now I have a much better idea of what colors to include in my room. These are a few of my favorites.

So do you want it? I know you do. just go HERE and learn more about it, and you can also just click on the "get chip it" button, drag it to your toolbar and you're all set. It's so simple, and you can just chip any little thing you see. It's so fun and addicting. 

I'm thinking of using this picture I took last summer as the palette for my living room when we move in a few weeks. Chip it and tell me what you think:)

Super Girl #21

21 on THE LIST: If you could have one superpower, what would it be and what would you do with it first?

 forget super powers, I wouldn't mind just looking this good in a super hero outfit...

I would choose the ability to be in multiple places at once. And I would use it to be a better mom. I feel like I am constantly running and still never doing quite good enough. Ethan needs lots of extra help at school, but when I'm volunteering with him I can't be volunteering in Adia's class. And I have so much other stuff to do, I can't volunteer as often as I want to anyway, so one or the other is losing out all the time. Plus, I'm working so hard at finishing up school that it takes a lot of my time, and I can't be home every night to tuck the kids in, and I can't go on every single field trip or be the room mother or PTA president anymore. And it's only going to get worse when I finish school and get a real job. (fingers crossed) And then there's sports and activities with practices and recitals and games and competitions and I am running myself ragged trying to keep up with all of it, because one of the things I fear more than anything with the divorce is that the kids are going to suffer and I can't be enough for them, when they really need a dad around too. But it's impossible to make it to everything for everyone when I'm the only one doing it. And I don't have time to be a good friend, or daughter, or granddaughter or sister, and I don't visit the old crazy lady next door as often as I should, and I don't keep my house as clean as I like it, and I don't have fresh baked cookies when the kids get home from school every day, and I NEVER have relaxing alone time. And most of those things don't matter, and they aren't a matter of life and death, but they are things I want to be able to do, and if I could be in several places at once I could probably manage most of them. So that's what super power I would wish for. Of course having more hands would be super useful, and the ability to fly would save tons of time, and seeing into the future would be way handy. And I've always thought that if I was just super strong I could probably rule the world... really any super power would be pretty nice, I certainly wouldn't turn it down, no matter what it was. 

3 stories #20

20 on THE LIST: Describe 3 significant memories from your childhood.


I have a lot of memories from growing up. I had a great childhood, and I could tell stories all day long, I'm sure. I don't know how significant these memories are, but they did each teach me a lesson that I've tried to apply to my life, so here we go...

5 year old me - notice I have the EXACT same smile now as I did then, I guess some things never change

One time when I was five, I learned that if you love your job every day is the best day of your life. My Parents started their own construction company the year I was born. They bought a truck and a dozer and took a huge gamble on our future. They are both really hard workers, my dad has incredible talent at what he does, and my mom is a miracle worker when it comes to budgeting, and they have created a hugely successful business now. But in the early years there was a lot of penny pinching, sacrificing, and going where the work was. One summer my dad got a "contract" which meant that he traveled all over western Colorado doing heavy equipment work for some people in multiple locations. And being his built in assistants his three best girls tagged along with him. We had the most extraordinary adventures sleeping in motels and eating out. We met all kinds of different people, and saw amazing sights , at least they were amazing to a 5 year old. We followed my dad around as he moved his dozer from location to location. Sometimes it was hot and dusty, but we would roll down the windows and let the breeze blow through the cab while my sister would read us stories or my mom would teach us songs. We had picnics almost every day, and my dad would tell us stories as we relaxed in the shade of the dozer and ate. We also got to swim in the motel pools and hike in the mountains and go to the park in a bunch of different towns. We did that for most of the summer, and I thought we were on an ultimate vacation. I couldn't imagine anything more wonderful, and I thought we were the luckiest family alive. It wasn't until the summer was nearly over that I was raving about our fantastic adventures and my sister said to me in one of those - you're-the-dumbest-person-I-have-ever-met, voices, "You know we're working, right? This is Dads JOB, and we're just here helping him." What? No, I hadn't realized we were working. I mean, I knew that we did some work, and Dad did a lot of work, but I hadn't made the connection that it was more than just a three month long trip for my enjoyment. I had been having the time of my life and all of a sudden it was brought to my attention that I had been tricked! I continued to have a good time regardless of the fact that we were working for the rest of the contract, but I still had some confusion about what my sister had meant. It wasn't until several years later that I finally realized that both of us had been right. We had been working, but we were also having the time of our lives, and it's okay for those things to go together. To this day some of my favorite memories involve us all helping my dad on a job. We joke and laugh, and while we work HARD, we have fun too. And as I have grown up I've realized that we were living the dream. :)

Snuggle time.

One time, I learned  that everyone needs a snuggle day every now and then. I was probably in 1st or 2nd grade, and I LOVED school. I never missed a day unless I was super sick. I couldn't wait to get up and go to school every morning. I counted the hours until the weekends were over so I could go back to school again. -what can I say I was a nerd - and also I had the very best teacher in the world (Mrs. Atkinson, from my 10 significant people post ) But one day I woke up and I didn't want to go to school. I just wanted to stay home and snuggle with my mom. I don't know why, nothing had happened at school to make me not want to go, I was feeling fine, health wise, I just felt tender that day. I was a little weepy and emotional, and I nearly cried as I was walking down to the bus stop. When the bus came, I made a decision, I hid until the bus left and then I went back to my house and told my mom I missed it and I didn't feel like going to school. I broke into tears and couldn't explain what was the matter. I thought for sure my mom would tell me to "buck up buttercup" and take me to school anyway. But she didn't. She let me put on my jammas and curl up on the couch with a blanket and watch cartoons. She cooked me whatever snacks I asked for and just loved on me all day long. And the next day I was fine again, and couldn't wait to get back to school. I think all of us have an off day now and then. We don't feel well, or we are overly emotional, or we just get in a funk of some kind. We all just need a cuddle day every once in a while, and so when my kids have one of those days I follow my mom's example and let them have it. It's not like it happens that often, so I feel like it's alright to give in when it does. It helps us build a strong relationship, they can trust me to be understanding, and we can talk about things that are bothering them. And I have to tell you, I kind of love when they need a snuggle day too. Who can resist that?

 My daddy teaching Ethan to creek fish

One time I learned how that spending time with your family makes an impact that nothing else will make up for. The summer I was 8 my dad and I started going fishing a lot. My sister was 13 - you know, that age that everyone reaches where you're far too cool to hang out with your dad and little sister and FISH- gag me with a spoon! (now you can place the time period, and you really feel like you're there, right?:) And my mom never wanted to tag along either, so that just left the two of us. My dad's busy season for work is the summer, and at that time of our lives that meant he usually left before the sun came up and got home after dark. But on Saturdays he usually quit a little early, and that was our chance. I dug worms and had the poles ready to load and some snacks packed to eat on the way, and as soon as he got home we were off. We found this "secret spot" up on the creek where no one else went. We drove in on a road that was terrible. It was rocky and washed out all the time, I don't think it was ever maintained. And there was a hill that was so steep I always thought we were going to flip right over when we went down it. I remember leaning back in the seat and putting my feet up against the dash to keep from falling through the windshield- or at least that's how I remember it. And getting out was even harder. We had to get a run at the hill and we would bounce and climb up, and if we were lucky we would make it to the top. Sometimes we didn't though, and we would have to BACK down the hill and try it again. It was terrifying, but I had so much trust in my dad that I knew we would be safe. I just clamped my eyes shut and held on for all my might. The trip was worth it though, because we had found a magical spot where the fish were always biting. We would part the truck and walk through a big grove of scrub oak to the creek. Then we would put our poles in the water and follow them down a ways to a spot where there was a bend in the creek. The water was deeper there, and it seemed to be where all the fish stayed waiting for a free lunch. Creek fishing in this part of the world is an art, really, the water is shallow and the creek is narrow. In some places you can nearly jump across it without getting wet. And the creek bottom is rocky and rough. You have to stay completely out of sight of where you fish or the fish will see you and NOTHING will bite after that. And you have to watch your line closely and learn the difference between a bite and the roughness of the water as it tumbles across the rocks. You also had to learn to guide the fish as you reeled it in, judging where the rocks were the smoothest and leading them through the path of least resistance. Otherwise they would swim into the rocks and get your line snagged and get away. But over the course of the summer my dad  taught me all the tricks, and we always ended up catching our limit every night. But the fish weren't really the reason we fished. None of us are big fish eaters anyway. No, the draw for us was the time we spent together. We would sit along the bank about 50 yards from the magic spot and wait for the fish to bite. My dad would lounge out in the tall grass and I would lean up against him. When the sun would sink down lower in the sky and a chill would start to set in he would put his arm around me to keep me warm. We saw all kinds of wildlife as we sat on the bank. One time a deer even came and took a drink from the creek right next to where we stood. We literally could have reached out and touched it! We talked about all sorts of things, and I knew that at that moment with my dad nothing was off limits. He taught me a lot of really great life lessons that summer - things that I will never forget, and things that I have used a lot as I've grown up. And it set up a relationship that only deepened as I grew older. It wasn't until much later that I thought about that summer and realized that he took off work early for me. He certainly could have worked a few more hours, and probably would have rather done that some days, but he knew that I was waiting, so he took the time out to spend with me anyway. It was a sacrifice, but one that he was more than willing to make in order to make a difference in my life. And he did. Not only do I have an extremely strong relationship with my dad, but because of his example I am trying to take little opportunities with my own kids to help foster our relationship as well. 

Location #19

19 on THE LIST: If you could live anywhere, where would it be and why?

Greece.
Because it's beautiful there. And warm. I speak from speculation, not ever having actually been to Greece myself, but that's what I imagine. Plus, I love the food, the culture, the climate, the way of life. I love the people I have met from Greece. I love the pride they have in their country. I could totally see myself fitting in there. Of course, I wouldn't want to go there until my kids are raised, and after that I wouldn't want to live there when I have grandkids. So I guess a life in Greece is out for me. Oh, well, a girl can dream, can't she?

But... since my answer to this topic is less than interesting, I decided to change the question, and instead of where do I want to go, it's more of where have I been. My #19 is Tell us a little more about where you grew up.

The Wilcox Ranch homestead

I grew up in the tiny town of La Sal Utah. It's about 30 minutes south of Moab, and 10 miles from the edge of the earth. It is a teeny tiny little place population about 300. ( I have a side track funny story here - when my uncle got married, he married a lady with three daughters. The two older daughters were in high school and stayed in Northern Utah with their dad, but the youngest was still in elementary school and moved to La Sal with her mom. One day she was over at our house and she was talking about why her sisters stayed with their dad. She gave us the reasons, and then as a final reason she said, "besides, Kristen says La Sal is the butt crack of the world anyway." It killed me. I thought it was hilarious. And as our family does, to show you we love you, we teased Kristen about it from that day on. She was mortified, which made it all the better. Kristen is no longer with it, but every time I think of her it's with a giggle. ) It started out as a ranching community, and still is somewhat, though most of the people there now, work out of town and commute everyday. My great, great grandpa, and great grandpa moved here and helped settle the area, and part of their homestead still belongs to my mom. The above picture is taken from the homestead.

 It sits at the foot of the La Sal mountains, and it's still about as close to the "wild west" as there is. There is a tiny store and a post office, but if you need to do any real shopping you have to go somewhere else for that. The nearest grocery store is 30 minutes away, and if you need more than just the basics, you have to travel 2 and a half hours. It takes real planning to live there, and the ones who do have real dedication. Still, there is something that grabs you, and ties you to La Sal  that is hard to explain. I guess it comes down to the feeling of home. Even if it isn't your actual home, if you spend much time there you just start to feel like it is. That's probably because of the people and the culture. You wouldn't survive in La Sal without friends, so you learn to love the people there right away. And it's easy to do. For the most part the people there love and accept you no matter what you look like, how much money you have, or what your story is.

Taken off the side of one of the many dirt roads in La Sal. And yes there is a redneck joke about "if directions to your house say, 'when you leave the pavement...' and yes, it's a little bit true... :)

4th of July parade- anything goes!

There are some funny little quirks about La Sal that make it unique and wonderful. First, we have some fantastic traditions. We have a 4th of July parade there where all the kids dress up in whatever they want and travel on anything from foot to 4 wheeler to horse to tractor down "main street" that would take about 3 minutes, so they always turn around and go back to where they came from to make it last a little longer. It cracks me up every time, I love it. We also have a potato patch that all the members of the community plant and take care of all summer and then in the fall we all get together and harvest them and give them to the families who need  them. It is one of my favorite things. The adults visit as they work and catch up on what is going on with everyone, and the kids play together and get filthy. They gather all the weeds into one huge pile and jump in them until their eyes are swollen shut, and at harvest time they run along behind the potato picker and gather all the potatoes as fast as they can. Then that night every one brings their favorite potato dish to the community center and an older couple gives out prizes for the kids who found the largest and smallest potato and sometimes for the strangest looking one, or anything resembling a person we might know:) We also celebrate Cinco de Mayo almost every year since I can remember. There is a 5k a volleyball tournament, kids games, a potluck, occasionally a dance, it's delightful. I'm not sure why we do it as we don't have a very large hispanic population in La Sal, but it's great anyway. And there's the school's halloween carnival which is by far the best I've ever been to. Everyone's a winner and the whole community joins in. Then there's a trunk or treat afterwards, and some of the families in town go all out decorating their trunks and making a spook alley for the kids and things like that. And then there's the dynamite shoot. One family started this, but now it's a much loved tradition. They fill cans with dynamite and shoot them with guns from long distances, blowing them up. Even if you aren't at the shoot you can hear explosions from all over  town. Doesn't get much more red neck fabulous than that. It's the best!

The original section of the little schoolhouse 

There is also this cute little school in La Sal. It holds grades K-3, there are two teachers (sometimes just 1 depending on the number of students) and anywhere between 15-25 students depending on the year. It is the same school that my parents went to when they were in Kindergarten, and where they met and fell in love because my dad was a momma's boy and cried, and my mom tried to help him feel better. It's where I went to school, and for a year my kids went to school, and I love the education each of us got there. I also love that kids learn to work in La Sal. It takes a lot of work to live there, and everyone pitches in. I like that there is that built in work ethic that will seriously benefit them as they grow up. And you can drive when you're like, 12, and no one stops you. You can ride your 4 wheeler down the road, and shoot prairie dogs out of your truck window. A handshake is a binding contract and a phone call is all it takes to get help when you need it. It's just a more laid back life, and it makes me so happy. I feel really blessed to have grown up here. If you're ever in the area stop by for a bit. You will love it! :)

 And possibly one of my very favorite things about La Sal is that it has the most spectacular sunsets. I have been to a lot of places in my life, but I have never seen more stunning sunsets than right in my own back yard - where this picture was snapped just last night...