Happy Halloween!

It's The Simple Things

I am the best mom ever according to my kids. I'm super popular, and and they can't stop hugging me. Want to know what I did? It took a ton of effort and sacrifice. Not everyone can achieve it, but I'll let you in on the secret in case you want to try. Here goes, are you ready?...

1. I went out of town for a whole weekend and left them home. They actually missed me, and now they are super nice to me.

2. When I came back I brought them something special... Flintstones Gummie Vitamins (with added choline to support healthy brain function - yeah, I'm cool like that:) I'm not even kidding. They think it's the best thing ever!

See, it isn't easy to be as cool as me. What can I say, I have mad skillz!

(just a side note, I'm super NOT cool, I'm a total geek because even just spelling skills with a z like that is giving me some major anxiety. I might have to go back and change it. Lame, I totally know!)

Ya, know what I love?

Pizza Hut on a Tuesday night. Not because I am really that fond of Pizza Hut-at all- but because it isn't crowded on Tuesday night. I'm not sure why, but it's nice and quiet, only a few people here and there, no big rushes, or loud people. That matters a lot when you have a son like Ethan. He isn't terrible, but when you get him in a situation with lots of people, lots of noise, and lots of smells, it is a total sensory overload for the little guy. Then you tell him to sit still, and be quiet, and have manners, and chew with his mouth closed, it's pretty much a guaranteed melt down waiting to happen. So we like quiet restaurants. Like Pizza Hut on a Tuesday. That's where we found ourselves tonight. Ethan did great in school (confirmed by Mr. Allen who called to say that when he gave Ethan his score of a 5 on his agenda-the highest score available- Ethan said, "you better call my mom because she is NEVER going to believe this!" And being the total sweetie he is, he actually did call, even though he has a million better things to do with his time. What a good teacher, right? We are so spoiled!) So he earned something special, and he chose to go out to eat.

You know what I DON'T love? When you are enjoying a quiet meal at a place specifically chosen for it's lack of people, and a BUS full of LOUD HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL PLAYERS shows up and wrecks the peace and quiet, and sends Ethan into a cover-his-head-with-his-jacket-and-duck-under-the-table-where-he-precedes-to-rock-back-and-forth-and-talk-to-himself attack. Yeah that totally ruins the night, I'll tell you.

You know what I do love though? When the high school boys, all on their own, with no guidance from their coach, notice Ethan having his little melt down, ask what is going on, and then do their very best to keep their voices down, and be respectful to Ethan and the situation. They also talked to him about football after he calmed down, and winked at Adia, who thought they were all dreamy. They didn't have to do that, they weren't being out of control or anything, they were just being regular loud high school boys. But they were respectful enough to do it anyway. It's really nice when kids act responsibly, and think outside of themselves. It's especially nice when they do it on their own instead of being asked. It's refreshing, and I was quite impressed and very grateful for these young men who helped make our night enjoyable. Ahhh, nice people really are out there somewhere.

PS: does this post make me sound like my grandma??? When did I get so old?

With Friends Like These...

I love my friends. Like, really, when I make a friend I keep them FOREVER! I still have friends that I have known since I was born. I am a very loyal friend. Once we are friends, I've got your back. Friends are really important to me. I love how a real friend can read your thoughts. I love how you can be your really real self around your friends, and they love you anyway. I love how real friends don't judge your parenting, the way you look, or the cleanliness of your house. I love how real friends help you even when you don't ask, and when you do ask, -for something totally unreasonable, they always come through, no questions asked. I love how with real friends you become more like family that just friends (though I'm blessed that many of my friends ARE family) I mean, think about it, when your world falls apart, who do you call? When the most exciting thing EVER happens, who do you call? Your friends. They are the ones that help you through life. Without my friends, I wouldn't be able to make it. My friends have been the ones who have carried me through the toughest part of my life, when I couldn't stand on my own, and the ones that screamed and jumped up and down and did the crazy dance with me at those moments when life is the best. I take my friendships very seriously. It takes some extra effort, but it is worth it in the end, because it matters that much to me.

I have been really blessed that several of my good friends married people that I have become really good friends with as well. (You know how sometimes you have a friend, but you CANT STAND her husband, so you never do things with their family? Yeah, that isn't my problem.) It's rare, but I actually love their spouses as much (if not more sometimes;) than the original friend. That is the case with Levi and Jeremy. I have been friends with them since I was in 8th grade. (that's a LOOOONG time, people, I'm getting old here!) Jeremy was like the big brother I never had, and Levi was my very best friend in high school. I love those guys. And then they went and got married. That was a little scary, because you never know how the wife is going to feel about some crazy lady hanging around their husband. But these ladies are amazing. They don't mind me and my intense family coming in and crashing the party. Stacy doesn't mind that I practically lived at her house all summer, and brought my kids over to eat all of her pudding. In fact, she keeps inviting us back. Cassie doesn't mind that I call her husband at crazy hours of the night to talk about nothing, in fact she often joins in on the conversation. (She's usually the one that keeps us under control, she's the "grown up", we need her) I am so lucky to have these ladies in my life. I don't even know how I functioned without them. They really are two of my very best friends. When we were desperately fighting our adoption battle, who fasted and prayed and cried with us? And who was sitting right there next to us as we were sealed as a family in the temple? Who stayed late and cleaned up the after party following the sealing celebration? Who was right beside me when my smart mouth nearly got us raped and plundered by that cop in Mexico? And just a few months ago, when my life turned completely upside down in the blink of an eye, and I didn't know if I was going to survive it, who did I call to tell me that everything was going to be alright? See, these ladies are my rock. I need them. Those two boys I love so much were really smart (and super lucky) when they picked these girls to be their wives. They are great. Everyone should be so lucky as me, to have them in my life.

That being said, they are also very committed to helping me find a new husband. They keep me in mind all the time, and are constantly on the look out for husband #2. Just a couple of weeks ago I was at Levi and Cassie's for movie night when the subject of finding me a man came up once again. Cassie said that she saw an ad in the newspaper of a single man with two children seeking a wife. Of course she instantly thought of me! What a good friend, right?

Then last Saturday we were at the community potato patch, helping with the harvest, when a nice older gentleman stopped by handing out pamphlets for his son who is running for county sheriff. Stacy, being the great friend that she is, takes one look at his picture, and pipes up (Loud enough for the ENTIRE COMMUNITY to hear, I might add!) "Hey, he's good looking! Is he single? Because KATIE over here is looking for a husband!" Sadly, he is already married, so I guess I'm out of luck. But wasn't she nice to ask? I'm really lucky to have these good friends who have my back. And though, I don't think I'm quite as desperate as they apparently think I am, it really is reassuring to know that somebody out there cares about my future happiness. So, thanks girls. Keep up the good work. I hope you know how much I love you both:)

Smelling something

I have been fighting off a cold for the last week, so I have been rubbing oregano, peppermint, and eucalyptus oil on my neck and chest every night and morning. It stinks, I know it, but it helps, so I keep doing it anyway. This morning after doing that I was helping Adia get dressed. She took a big sniff and said "Oh, Mom, your perfume has mixed with your toothpaste, and it smells delightful!"

I'm glad to know that I smelled delightful, but it makes me worried about what my regular perfume smells like. If she thinks that all of that stink smelled like my perfume-yuck! So please, if you are around me and you can tell I stink, Please, do a girl a favor, and let me know. I won't be offended, I will just switch to a different perfume. And to all of you who have been thinking for years, "boy that lady smells like a medicine cabinet" and didn't tell me, I don't think we can be friends anymore. This is me breaking up with you!

Clouded Vision

A few weeks ago Ethan came home from school with a paper from the district health nurse. Evidently he didn't pass his vision screening. He thought he needed glasses, and he was EXCITED! (I have no idea why) This isn't the first time that Ethan hasn't passed an eye exam. He has a hard time staying focused, so several times he would be looking at something other than the eye chart, and they would say "Can you see this" well, No, he couldn't because he wasn't looking at it, therefore, he would fail the screening. Usually his teacher takes notice of this and lets me know, and I don't worry too much about it. This year, however, the teacher wasn't there, and the nurse assured me that he really was trying, he just couldn't see the chart. So I made an appointment with the eye doctor in Moab. It took three weeks to get it, that's the joy of having few options, you wait until they are ready for you.

So a week later, as we are still waiting for our eye appointment we go to the pediatrician. Out of the blue as he is examining Ethan he asks, "have you gotten his eyes checked lately?" I start to panic, could there be a serious problem? What would make the pediatrician ask about eyes? He never has before? What's going on? I tell the doctor about Ethan not passing the school eye exam. Ethan excitedly tells him that he needs glasses. I ask what the heck he means by asking about eyes,-he isn't an eye doctor! Just what is he getting at here? (My pediatrician loves me, can you tell?:) He answers that it is nothing, he was just asking, and quit analyzing every little thing he says. (See, it's love) But here's something that you might not know. It's a little known fact, but in my extensive experience with all kinds of doctors over the last five years, I finally cracked the code, and learned this secret. I'm going to share it with you now, are you ready? Listen carefully... Not all doctors tell you the whole truth All the time. SHHH! Don't tell! But, it's true, especially if they have hard news to give you, and they know that you are seeing a specialist concerning the same problem. Sometimes they think you might be an overemotional parent or something, and if they know that you are going to hear it from someone else very soon, they dodge the bullet and let the other guy deal with it. (I don't know why anyone would think I am overly emotional, I'm not, I'm just passionate. I'm just saying that some doctors might misjudge the situation or something:)

So here I am FREAKING out, um, I mean, feeling very passionate about the subject of Ethan's vision... FOR TWO MORE WEEKS!!! until I can get in to see the blasted eye doctor who I'm sure is going to tell me that Ethan is going blind. Can you imagine Ethan not being able to see. He can't even walk across a flat floor without tripping, how on earth is he going to navigate this crazy world without being able to see anything. He's going to end up one of those kids who have to wear a helmet. And I would never be able to let him out of my sight again. And I am already pretty busy... and I never sleep... and that's starting to make me slightly crazy as it is... and how is he going to get a date to prom if he can't see and has to wear a helmet... and the helmet is going to make him bald, and then everyone will be able to see the dent in his head... and I just barely got him to put aside his dreams of being the guy who sells cotton candy at the circus for bigger dreams of being a "cow doctor" and how the heck is he going to do either one of those jobs if he can't see... and he's allergic to dogs, so he won't even be able to use a seeing eye dog... I am NEVER going to be able to die, I HAVE TO LIVE FOREVER!... (You can see how things can get slightly out of control for a passionate person like myself:)

So finally the day comes when we go to see the eye doctor. I am nearly hyperventilating by the time we walk into the office - why in the heck did I take the afternoon appointment instead of the morning appointment? Who the heck cares if he misses READING? When are you going to use that in real life?:) The doctor checks him out. Ethan tells him that he needs glasses. The doctor tells Ethan that he gets to decide that. He asks Ethan over and over if he knows his letters. We assure him he does. He tells Ethan a few times that he needs to tell the truth. He does all kinds of tests, we are there for almost two hours. I am about to have a panic attack. Finally he says that Ethan has a small astigmatism (where the eye is slightly oval shaped instead of round) That might make things a little fuzzy, but shouldn't effect him too much, and certainly isn't anything to worry about. But here is the real problem... Are you ready?... Ethan really wants glasses and lied about not being able to see the chart. I know. His recommendation: get him some cheap frames with no lenses that he can wear around whenever he wants. My recommendation: Beat that little stinker...uh, I mean, talk to him about the importance of telling the truth to doctors and his mother.:)

So I call the pediatrician and tell him that there was nothing to worry about. He answers that he knows, he really had been just asking, this is about the age that you need to start getting things like that checked out.

So, that's the story. But it got me thinking about my life lately. Have you ever had something that you wanted so badly that it clouded your judgement from what was real? I think I have been doing that. In my heart I know that something isn't right. It isn't wrong exactly, it just isn't right for me right now. But I want it so badly that I keep telling myself it is right until I almost have myself and the people around me convinced that it's true. It isn't that big of a deal, and if I pretend long enough there's a good chance it will be true. But it's just like Ethan's glasses. He doesn't need them, but if he were to get them it wouldn't hurt anybody else, so maybe it isn't that big a deal. But after a while it will start hurting his eyes. It might even damage his vision so he actually DOES need glasses. He needs to just be honest about it, even though it might be hard, and maybe a little disappointing, in the long run it will save him a lot of pain. I think that's where I am. I need to make the decision to save myself some pain. It's just making myself give up on the thing I really want that's the hard part. Have you ever been here? Have you ever REALLY wanted glasses?