Joy #17

Surprises!

I love surprises. I love that about Christmas. I love the anticipation of not knowing exactly what to expect, and even more I love the excitement of waiting to surprise someone else. Adia can't handle surprises. She can't keep a secret. She has good intentions, but it's like a little explosion inside of her, she just can't keep it in. If she did, she really might explode. She doesn't like surprises, but I sure do.

This week has been the week of surprises. Some of them were slightly unpleasant, (like my final being held on the day before I originally thought it was going to be, or like Ethan having an accident at school and I opened his back pack-surprise! ) But there were two in particular that were wonderful surprises from very thoughtful friends. On Tuesday I went to the post office to get the mail, and inside there was a package for me. I opened it up and found a beautiful little nativity. (the one on the top) I have to tell you, I was in tears instantly. I love that little thing. The picture doesn't even do it justice. It is so unique, and the colors are vibrant. It is just the sweetest thing ever. It made me feel so good that she had thought of me, and listened to the things I ramble about. I was amazed that someone would do something so sweet out of the blue like that. I was even more touched when I got ahold of her to thank her for it, and she told me the story behind it. (That's tomorrow's joy, so I'm gonna leave you hanging on that one:) The whole thing was so touching that I get weepy every time I look at that cute little nativity.

Then today I went to the post office, and once again there was a package for me. This one was from my friend/cousin Tawna. She had sent me a nativity too. (the one on the bottom) Can I just tell you, it is DARLING! I love it so much! The picture doesn't do it justice either. The pieces are so stinkin' cute I can't even describe it. And along with it she sent me a card telling me that she loved me and was thinking about me. Oh, the tears... again. It was exactly what I needed to hear, at exactly the right moment. Now, my family loves each other, there is no doubt about it, but we aren't the sit around and talk about your feelings type of family -AT ALL! So to get this note from her out of the blue like that blew me away. It really is special to me. Writing about it now is making me cry all over again. (Geez, when did I turn into such a girl?:)

Last week was a rough one for me. If was full of second guessing myself and feeling like I'm not being a very good mom. Like I'm not being a very good anything. Some of the things that happened made me feel like my life was just one big disaster after another, and I wondered how on earth I was going to pull it together and get through this. So this week, when I was feeling like giving up I got not one, but two reminders that I have people behind me supporting me, that will get me through this. It reminded me that it doesn't matter what I have lost, I have the opportunity to to start all over again and build my collection,- and build my life with memories of people who really love me and care about me. And things are going to be okay. And that brings me joy.